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Archive for November 2nd, 2020

Yesterday, I shared some jokes about Joe Biden (since updated with a very amusing addendum). Today, to keep everything fair, we’re going to make fun of Trump.

We’ll start with Trump playing the role of James Bond.

Next, let’s look at Trump’s view of the world with this map.

If you liked this map, check out this collection of Trump maps from 2018.

There is some good news for Trump, at least according to Babylon Bee, America’s best site of satire.

Trump is polling high among an unexpected group: libertarians, who were energized and drawn to Trump’s cause after the New York Times revealed that he paid as little as $750 in federal taxes some years. “Only paying a few hundred in federal theft? This guy is my hero!” said libertarian man Murray Mickelson of New Hampshire. “If only all of us could be that smart with our taxes.” …Libertarians across the country paid tribute to Trump’s accomplishment by firing their AR-15s into the air and doing hard drugs, though this is what they were already planning on doing anyway.

Though let’s not forget Biden also aggressively avoided taxes, so libertarians may be torn.

I’m not sure there’s much mileage left in the Trump-Russia issue, but this cartoon got a chuckle from me.

The Onion has faded as a satire site, but it still produces some amusing material, such as this story about the Trump version of poll watching.

Pushing back against what he viewed as an overly hysterical media narrative, Trump supporter Tom Nagle whispered his assertion Monday that poll watching is not intimidation into the ear of a man filling out a ballot. “Keeping an eye on what’s going on at the polls is simply a way to ensure that the election is conducted fairly,” said an armed Nagle, his hot breath reportedly palpable on the prospective voter’s neck as he continually issued assurances that he was merely there to safeguard democracy. …At press time, Nagle had beaten the man unconscious after he was unable to immediately produce a voter ID.

The Onion also produced an article detailing how Trump can win.

With the election around the corner, the Republican Party campaign of President Donald Trump is looking for ways to win reelection over his Democratic Party challenger, Joe Biden. The Onion looks at key factors that could help Trump defeat Biden and retain the presidency. …Disenfranchise millions of Biden supporters with scheme to use electoral college exactly as intended. Win over undecided voters by committing to spare their lives during second term. …Giving everyone another 12 hundo couldn’t hurt. Disarm one of Biden’s key electoral advantages by killing Eric so he has a deceased son too. …Pledge to uphold core Republican values like massive voter suppression. Highlight dozens of crimes Biden failed to prevent him from committing during his first term. Refuse to accept election results citing upcoming Supreme Court ruling.

I’ve already predicted Trump will lose tomorrow.

But he’s about to get even worse news.

As usual, I’ve saved the best for last. I laughed out loud when I saw this meme.

Ouch!

P.S. If yesterday’s jokes and today’s jokes are insufficient, I shared some mockery of both Joe Biden and Donald Trump back in August.

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