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Archive for April 22nd, 2018

My collection of “Libertarian Humor” is very ecumenical since I have “pro” jokes and “con” jokes.

Today, we’re going to add to the latter collection with three new items.

We’ll start with some satire about the theoretical Libertarian Party vs the real-world Libertarian Party. I get the feeling the guy on the right is an older version of Libertarian Doofus 1 or Libertarian Doofus 2.

Maybe this means we have to create a new type of libertarian. After all, the guy on the right doesn’t fit any of the 24 categories in this collection. Well, maybe three rows down and second from the right, but I don’t want to be judgemental.

For our second item, here’s some great satire from Babylon Bee about a libertarian driver’s heroic effort to avoid government-funded roads.

In a calculated move intended to demonstrate the power of the free market, libertarian man Patrick Wallace drove his SUV through dozens of other peoples’ back yards, across several open fields, over a stretch of rocky terrain, and even off a cliff into a small ravine in order to avoid using any government-funded roads, sources confirmed Thursday. According to witnesses, the man got into his vehicle to head to work, started it up, and immediately barreled across his lawn, down his neighbor’s side yard, through a row of back yards, and right into an adjacent wood, all while carefully preventing his tires from ever touching any road built by tax dollars. “What would we do without roads funded by government coercion? That’s easy,” the man told reporters later as he attempted to push his car out of a creek. “We’d be able to drive straight to work through any obstacles we wanted, without the state telling us we’re not allowed to launch over a gully to get to the office on time.” …After getting his car moving again, Wallace reportedly hurtled down the brook, across a steep ski slope, and burst through a cemetery, waving at the groundskeeper to get out of the way, before launching off a homemade ramp over a county road to his office. At publishing time, Wallace had fashioned a rope swing at the office in order to help him get to the Dunkin’ Donuts across the street without walking on “roads funded by theft.”

Reminds me of the libertarian police officer who tried to chase a criminal without stepping on government sidewalks.

Another example of why it ain’t easy being libertarian. We need a Nirvana where all infrastructure is private!

Lastly, we have an observation about the ongoing challenge of trying to stop statism.

There’s a lot of truth to this image. Most libertarians in the real world don’t worry too much about theory. They just want more freedom.

But in the world of professional libertarians, there are sectarian fights between Randians, Austrians, anarcho-capitalists, Rothbardians, liberaltarians, and many other niche groups. And they oftentimes don’t get along with each other.

No wonder we have a hard time getting others to agree with our agenda.

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